The Junkyard

Where Dawg fans hunker down

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Record: 3990 (6/13/2012)


Kolton Houston?

  • After reading the linked article below earlier last year, I got to thinking: there has to be some rational explanation for the positive tests since April 2010. From my extensive research (by "extensive research" I mean two minutes on Google), I learned that the anabolic steroid (19-norandrosterone) should have been out of his system long ago.

    (I should mention that I might have been drinking at the time, so the accuracy of my scientific findings could be suspect.)

    Even so,

    I wonder if we have gathered enough experts to solve this problem. I hope we haven't just listened to one or two doctors and given up. I hate to think that there's some simple explanation that the doctors are missing.

    I have seen this scenario before.

    Not to get too personal, but I suffered from panic attacks for a couple of years, went to doctor after doctor, and they could not tell me anything useful that helped to prevent the attacks. They just gave me drugs that not only did not work but made me feel weird, like Crispin Glover weird--and after hitting that drifter with my car late that one night, I knew I had to stop.

    So anyway, one day I walk into an emergency room in rural Ga. thinking I was near death. When the Indian doctor came in, I told her flat: "I am NOT leaving until you fix me." She looks at me and asks "So, do you ever drink any caffeine?" I said, "well yes, of course; in fact, I just drank some not 30 minutes ago," to which she responded "well stop."

    I was cured!!!

    We need to figure this out. I e-mailed some expert at Oxford in the UK. I have not heard back.

    We need answers damnit!!! And beer. If we had more beer, we'd have more answers--or at least a better question.

    Get on this, Gentry.

  • Absolutely hilarious! But good point too! My sons and I are laughing!